I've been doing my devotions in my notebook; I've just been so scatterbrained...
i feel...(numb)...i feel entirely (too much)...
empty. unwilling. unworthy. unyielding. yearning. dissatisfied. disconcent. tired. weary. frustrated. fatigued. weak. unable. stuck. stuck. stuck. stuck. stuck. stuck.
stuck in the mire...can't go back...can't go forward...just...sinking (gulp).
sometimes the only consolation is...He loves me. I need to shout it on the roof top...HE LOVES ME! No matter what happens, even in the thick of things, He loves me. Isn't that enough? Shouldn't that be enough?
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Friday, February 2, 2007
Glad Hearts
"I have set the Lord always before me; because He is at my right hand I shall not be moved. Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoices." Psalm 16:8-9
In psalm 16, David demonstrates the type of relationship he has with God; he shows us where he stands, where God stands, and the consequences of maintaining such a relationship. David allows God to be fully in control of his life, placing God in the position of the right-hand man, as well as the One to go before David in all situations. As a result, David's heart is "glad".
Allowing someone else to make a decision for us dictates vulnerbility and fear. For some reason, we think we are capable of making the most reasonable decisions on our own behalf. Ironically, we don't always know what's best for ourselves. And yet, the idea of giving up the reigns is hard because we don't like giving up control.
However, by allowing God to go before is the best choice. Even though it feels like we're losing control over the situation, our trust in God's ability and wisdom is actually securing the most infinitely perfect control possible. As a result, we can be assured that everything will come together for His will, and our hearts can be glad.
Dear God,
I want a glad heart. I want to be liberated from any fear or anxiety I have. Please help me to give up my hold on these ridiculous events in my life; I can't mend them; I can't erase them; I can't do anything. However, I want to trust that You will take care of everything in Your time.
In psalm 16, David demonstrates the type of relationship he has with God; he shows us where he stands, where God stands, and the consequences of maintaining such a relationship. David allows God to be fully in control of his life, placing God in the position of the right-hand man, as well as the One to go before David in all situations. As a result, David's heart is "glad".
Allowing someone else to make a decision for us dictates vulnerbility and fear. For some reason, we think we are capable of making the most reasonable decisions on our own behalf. Ironically, we don't always know what's best for ourselves. And yet, the idea of giving up the reigns is hard because we don't like giving up control.
However, by allowing God to go before is the best choice. Even though it feels like we're losing control over the situation, our trust in God's ability and wisdom is actually securing the most infinitely perfect control possible. As a result, we can be assured that everything will come together for His will, and our hearts can be glad.
Dear God,
I want a glad heart. I want to be liberated from any fear or anxiety I have. Please help me to give up my hold on these ridiculous events in my life; I can't mend them; I can't erase them; I can't do anything. However, I want to trust that You will take care of everything in Your time.
Cut to the Heart
"When they heard these things they were cut to the heart, and they gnashed at him with their teeth..." Acts 7:54
Stephen, being attacked by those wanting to stir the people against Jesus' disciples, begins to provide a thorough history as proof to the authencity of Jesus and also as evidence for their folly in rejecting the truth. Though he rightfully shows the parallel of the Israelites' hard-heartedness to these men, the effect, though on their heart, does not urge them to repentence.
The men hear Stephen's accusation, but instead of turning from their ways, they allow their anger and pride to override the guilt that they feel. They translate those feelings into hate and revenge, instead of allowing the feelings to manifest into humility. They turn against Stephen, and end up killing him.
When we are wrong, we cannot get defensive. The embarrassment we experience must be fermented into humility rather than covered with anger. Being "cut to the heart" is painful, but God wants us to repent and grow.
Dear God,
Help me to know when I am wrong, especially if I am not representing You as best as I can. Lead me to repentence and humility as a result of my carelessness or selfishness, and dismantle my pride from growing into something destructive.
Stephen, being attacked by those wanting to stir the people against Jesus' disciples, begins to provide a thorough history as proof to the authencity of Jesus and also as evidence for their folly in rejecting the truth. Though he rightfully shows the parallel of the Israelites' hard-heartedness to these men, the effect, though on their heart, does not urge them to repentence.
The men hear Stephen's accusation, but instead of turning from their ways, they allow their anger and pride to override the guilt that they feel. They translate those feelings into hate and revenge, instead of allowing the feelings to manifest into humility. They turn against Stephen, and end up killing him.
When we are wrong, we cannot get defensive. The embarrassment we experience must be fermented into humility rather than covered with anger. Being "cut to the heart" is painful, but God wants us to repent and grow.
Dear God,
Help me to know when I am wrong, especially if I am not representing You as best as I can. Lead me to repentence and humility as a result of my carelessness or selfishness, and dismantle my pride from growing into something destructive.
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Willing Hearts
"From everyone who gives it willingly with his heart you shall take My offering." Exodus 25:2
Via Moses, God instructs the children of Israel to give offerings to Him as they begin to build a sancuary. There are definite requirements for what they can give; however, the critical condition is that they offer these gifts "willingly". God does not obligate us to give, but when we do, He accepts our offerings based on our motives.
It is not to say that obligation is inherently bad. If we love God, we should feel a sense of obligation or responsiblity to give. However, if the offering lacks alacrity or love, then the act of giving is meaningless and superficial. It is not the gift in itself that judges the man's heart, but rather the man's heart that judges the gift. Is the gift satisfactory? Is it good enough for God?
Obviously, God does not need our gifts. Plainly, our gifts will never be good enough for Him; however, when we give, it is a sign that we honor Him. And in honoring Him, we become less important as He becomes more important in our lives. In the case of the children of Israel, they were sacrificing their precious materials, but consequently these items were essential in building them a sancuary to worship God. In our lives, our sacrifice of goods and resources will help us focus more on Him; however, the condition is that we do it out of willingness.
Dear God,
Please help me to give willingly, so that I will be able to focus more of my life on You. Help me to not feel obligated to give, but rather help me to love to give because I love You.
Via Moses, God instructs the children of Israel to give offerings to Him as they begin to build a sancuary. There are definite requirements for what they can give; however, the critical condition is that they offer these gifts "willingly". God does not obligate us to give, but when we do, He accepts our offerings based on our motives.
It is not to say that obligation is inherently bad. If we love God, we should feel a sense of obligation or responsiblity to give. However, if the offering lacks alacrity or love, then the act of giving is meaningless and superficial. It is not the gift in itself that judges the man's heart, but rather the man's heart that judges the gift. Is the gift satisfactory? Is it good enough for God?
Obviously, God does not need our gifts. Plainly, our gifts will never be good enough for Him; however, when we give, it is a sign that we honor Him. And in honoring Him, we become less important as He becomes more important in our lives. In the case of the children of Israel, they were sacrificing their precious materials, but consequently these items were essential in building them a sancuary to worship God. In our lives, our sacrifice of goods and resources will help us focus more on Him; however, the condition is that we do it out of willingness.
Dear God,
Please help me to give willingly, so that I will be able to focus more of my life on You. Help me to not feel obligated to give, but rather help me to love to give because I love You.
Friday, January 26, 2007
Simplicity of Heart
"So continuing daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, they ate their food with gladness and simplicity of heart, praising God and having favor with all the people." Acts 2:46
As the news about Jesus' resurrection and way of salvation spreads, the church grows. The people, hearing the words that the disciples have to say, receive it and their lives consequently change. In Acts 2, those who make such a commitment are consistently partaking in fellowship with other believers at the temple and at home, and as a result of their dedicated lives, their hearts are described as being in the state of "simplicity".
It seems as if their priorities are uniquely fixated on one goal, one will, and "one accord". These new believers are not struggling with the complications of life; they are not attempting to sort out the confusion of the world; they are not dealing with the chaos of the time. They simply focus their lives on sweet fellowship, pure worship of God, and their lives, subsequently, touch others, "having favor with all the people," which implies even non-believers.
People are always searching for happiness, trying to attain some sort of peace in this life; however, everything aside from God seems to cause more complications. Whether it is a better education, a better job, a better reputation, a better appearance, all seem to entail more than what it initially appears. If our hope, however, is placed in the same One in which the early church believed, then our hearts will likewise be in the state of "simplicity". There should be no reason to fear, worry, or be anxious, because God is in control. The early church understood this concept, and thus, their hearts contained simple faith, simple faith in God.
Dear God,
Please help me to live in one solid accord with You. I want to live my life in simplicity of heart. I don’t want to be plagued by worries of this world. Help me to stay in fellowship and continually praise You daily.
As the news about Jesus' resurrection and way of salvation spreads, the church grows. The people, hearing the words that the disciples have to say, receive it and their lives consequently change. In Acts 2, those who make such a commitment are consistently partaking in fellowship with other believers at the temple and at home, and as a result of their dedicated lives, their hearts are described as being in the state of "simplicity".
It seems as if their priorities are uniquely fixated on one goal, one will, and "one accord". These new believers are not struggling with the complications of life; they are not attempting to sort out the confusion of the world; they are not dealing with the chaos of the time. They simply focus their lives on sweet fellowship, pure worship of God, and their lives, subsequently, touch others, "having favor with all the people," which implies even non-believers.
People are always searching for happiness, trying to attain some sort of peace in this life; however, everything aside from God seems to cause more complications. Whether it is a better education, a better job, a better reputation, a better appearance, all seem to entail more than what it initially appears. If our hope, however, is placed in the same One in which the early church believed, then our hearts will likewise be in the state of "simplicity". There should be no reason to fear, worry, or be anxious, because God is in control. The early church understood this concept, and thus, their hearts contained simple faith, simple faith in God.
Dear God,
Please help me to live in one solid accord with You. I want to live my life in simplicity of heart. I don’t want to be plagued by worries of this world. Help me to stay in fellowship and continually praise You daily.
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
Burning Hearts
"And they said to one another, 'Did not our heart burn within us while He talked with us on the road, and while He opened the Scriptures to us?'" Luke 24:32
After Jesus dies, He appears to his disciples, although they do not realize who He is. He spends time explaining to them the importance of everything pertaining to His mission from the "beginning at Moses and all the Prophets" (v. 27). Even though they are in His presence, their doubt and uncertainty blind their eyes; nevertheless, His words "burn" their hearts.
It is the power and truth contained in His words that captivate and stir them. These are familiar stories, as the disciples probably heard them all their lives; however, as Jesus retells them, the thread that ties them together finally is revealed. These words deliver the clear message of Jesus' love and salvation, and the truth penetrates their hearts.
As we delve into God's word, may it also burn our hearts. The disciples did not have to study arduously or be intellectually analytical; all they had to do was merely listen. They were eager to hear what He had to say, and in turn, their hearts were opened and they understood the wondrous meaning behind the Scriptures. Likewise, if we allow the word of God to simply enter our hearts, we may also experience the power of it.
Dear God,
Please help me to listen to Your word and hear what You have to say about Your love and salvation. May my heart burn intensely to know You more.
After Jesus dies, He appears to his disciples, although they do not realize who He is. He spends time explaining to them the importance of everything pertaining to His mission from the "beginning at Moses and all the Prophets" (v. 27). Even though they are in His presence, their doubt and uncertainty blind their eyes; nevertheless, His words "burn" their hearts.
It is the power and truth contained in His words that captivate and stir them. These are familiar stories, as the disciples probably heard them all their lives; however, as Jesus retells them, the thread that ties them together finally is revealed. These words deliver the clear message of Jesus' love and salvation, and the truth penetrates their hearts.
As we delve into God's word, may it also burn our hearts. The disciples did not have to study arduously or be intellectually analytical; all they had to do was merely listen. They were eager to hear what He had to say, and in turn, their hearts were opened and they understood the wondrous meaning behind the Scriptures. Likewise, if we allow the word of God to simply enter our hearts, we may also experience the power of it.
Dear God,
Please help me to listen to Your word and hear what You have to say about Your love and salvation. May my heart burn intensely to know You more.
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Hardened Heart
"But when Pharaoh saw that there was relief, he hardened his heart and did not heed them, as the Lord had said." Exodus 8:15
The second plague God allows to occur is the infestation of frogs. Frogs are described to be on and in every possible open surface, including inside the houses, within every crevice of each and every appliance, and even residing on top of people. There is no escape.
If the ten plagues of Egypt is a depiction of sin, the second plague specifically characterizes sin as annoying and pertinacious. Sin invades every part of one's life. There is no escape, aside from God. This realization beckons Pharaoh to relent, and surrender to Moses' request. However, the moment there is relief, Pharaoh's heart is hardened again.
In our lives, sin left untended to will fester and irritate. No matter how hard we try to ignore it, the effects and consequences of sin will continue to infest every part of our lives. However, when God allows a moment of relief, how do we respond? Do we allow sin to return? So often, we take advantage of God’s mercy, and we harden our hearts. We forget the pain of sin because our hearts are so calloused, and we fall again.
Dear God,
Help me not to be like Pharaoh. When sin enters my life, please remove it and help me to never let it return. Soften my heart so that I will be able to resist turning away from You.
The second plague God allows to occur is the infestation of frogs. Frogs are described to be on and in every possible open surface, including inside the houses, within every crevice of each and every appliance, and even residing on top of people. There is no escape.
If the ten plagues of Egypt is a depiction of sin, the second plague specifically characterizes sin as annoying and pertinacious. Sin invades every part of one's life. There is no escape, aside from God. This realization beckons Pharaoh to relent, and surrender to Moses' request. However, the moment there is relief, Pharaoh's heart is hardened again.
In our lives, sin left untended to will fester and irritate. No matter how hard we try to ignore it, the effects and consequences of sin will continue to infest every part of our lives. However, when God allows a moment of relief, how do we respond? Do we allow sin to return? So often, we take advantage of God’s mercy, and we harden our hearts. We forget the pain of sin because our hearts are so calloused, and we fall again.
Dear God,
Help me not to be like Pharaoh. When sin enters my life, please remove it and help me to never let it return. Soften my heart so that I will be able to resist turning away from You.
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