Wednesday, July 11, 2007

fearing God and not Calculus

13 The LORD Almighty is the one you are to regard as holy,
he is the one you are to fear,
he is the one you are to dread, (Isaiah 8)

I am so overwhelmed with calculus. I've only had two days of integration, a little over four hours of intense and intimidating instruction, and I am completely, utterly, so, so, so terribly behind. I have not completed or even started any of the homework assignments, not because I don't want to, but because I seriously don't have time. I barely have time to eat or sleep. I'm physically exhausted, and I am emotionally frazzled. This is always on my mind. This is what I fear right now. This is what I dread. How many hours I spend worrying over school? Too much.

God knows calculus. Um. Yeah, to say the least. He understands programming. Hah. Yes, He does. So, if I just trust in Him and try my very hardest, He'll pull me through. I shouldn't waste my time fretting about things I can't change. I just have to be confident that He will give me the wisdom, energy, and ability to do what I have to do. And let's say, I do fail. So what? Maybe I really just have to take a class again to really comprehend the subject matter. That's His will, and I just have to follow it. No matter what though, I have to fear Him and trust Him. It'll all work out in the end...

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